You may or may not know this by now, but I am an anxiety ridden person. Unfortunately, my oldest son also has the attribute. I say unfortunately, but I don’t really mean that. It’s not a bad thing to have anxiety, it’s only a matter of learning how to handle it.
I have had anxiety my whole life, and throughout my life it has manifested itself in different ways.
When I was younger, it showed as social anxiety. When I was in my 20s and had my first child, it manifested into flight phobia (badly – you can read my post about how I found a way to cope and ease my flight phobia), and now it’s a traveling in general anxiety.
Exhibit A is our recent camping trip. It was in bear country so naturally my first thought is we shouldn’t go because we will be eaten in our sleep by bears. False. At least, most of the time that is false, there are times when unfortunate episodes happen.
However, the whole trip was my idea so I had to make it happen. I listen to the ‘1000 Hours Outside’ podcast and of course I felt like I needed to get my kids camping and in nature. I love nature, and I love the morning time when camping. Eating breakfast in the woods by the campfire surrounded by trees and a running creek, heaven.
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Getting through the night is a much different experience. I love looking at the stars, but having to sleep in a tent? Not my thing. Everyone’s anxiety manifests in different ways, mine needs a protective area in which to sleep. A tent does not feel safe to me.
My brother on the other hand, who also has anxiety, has no problem sleeping alone in the woods without a tent. Our anxieties manifest differently. He was a rafting guide, worked at snow resorts, camps alone, and does all kinds of (what I deem) adventurous things.
Anyway, camping. In a tent.
To say I accomplished this task well, would, well, it would be a lie.
However, I did learn quite a few things to help me to do better next time. We’ve been camping before, and it seems (just as it did with my flight phobia) that my anxiety has a way of getting worse and worse until I feel like I just can’t do that thing again. I thought it was supposed to get easier the more times you did something. Apparently not for me.
Anxiety isn’t bad –
If you are reading this, and you have anxiety, just know you are not alone. You can still have a great life even with that extra protective helper hopping along with you.
Also, anxiety isn’t bad. It’s there to help us, warn us of potentially dangerous situations. Some of us have an overactive protection warning system and sometimes we need to help it calm down.
How to manage that overactive helper –
Note – I am not a professional. These are mechanisms that have helped me, and I am passing them along as helpful information. This is not medical advice. Always seek a provider when need be.
1. Am I Really in Danger? –
I like to look around and assess the real-life threat to my life. Is there a severe threat? Or I am okay, but I do need to still be aware of my surroundings and it’s okay to breathe?
Take camping for example: Is there animal charging at you from the woods? In most cases, no.
Are you in an area that may flash flood and it’s raining heavily? Most likely no, although do some research beforehand.
Did you leave all of your food out near your tent? You probably cleaned up everything and stored it in a bear box, in your car, or hung it from a tree.
2. Try to Remember Why You are Doing What You are Doing –
Anxiety can take the joy out of the journey.
Sometimes I get caught up on getting to the destination that I forgot about the journey to get there. My anxious thoughts keep thinking about how I need to stay tense until I get where I’m going or until the journey is over.
What I should be thinking about is, this is really great. I get undistracted time with my family or my husband or my friends, whoever it may be. Next, I need to look at what I’m feeling, hearing, and touching. Last, I need to remember to live in THAT moment, and not the future moments of my destination that I’ve concocted in my head.
3. Breathe & Find Real Things –
One thing that tends to happen to me when my anxiety kicks into overdrive is that my muscles tighten, my breathing becomes shallow, my heart races, I get a pit in my stomach, and I feel like I’m going to pass out.
I don’t always notice right away, but when I do, I remind myself to take deep breaths. Breathe in and breathe out. That alone doesn’t usually work.
No matter what anxious situation I am in, I go back to my SOAR book training. Name (in your head or out loud) five things that you hear, see, and feel. It’s described in the book that this brings you back to reality and gets you out of your head.
It works every time.
Aside from camping, flight phobia became a big problem for me over the last decade. The last time I was in mid-flight and my overprotective helper came upon me, my legs began to shake.
I took a breath, and focused my thoughts on five separate things I could hear, see, and feel. My brain calmed down and realized that I’m not truly in danger. I was able to stay calm through all of the turbulence.
4. When All Else Fails – Phone a Friend
Now, you may have supportive people with you that you can talk to or you may not. Whenever I am in a situation where none of my techniques are working for whatever reason, I turn to people.
I’ve talked to strangers on a plane about my anxieties.
I’ve talked to mom who thinks I’m crazy for my flight phobia, but not my camping phobias. 🙂
I talk to my husband and kids all the time when I feel like I’m losing it. My kids are so good about trying to reassure me. They don’t get it, but they still have compassion. Most people will even if they can’t understand it.
Hang in There My Anxiety Friends –
Just remember, I’m always here. I understand the anxiety struggle. I know not everyone understands because it’s hard to understand. My hope is that you won’t let an overprotective anxiety helper keep you from living your life. Those bucket list adventures that you want to do, are totally worth it if it’s important to you. I know you’ve got this!
Items That Help Me When Traveling with Anxiety –
These are some of my favorite things. When I bring these with me, wherever I go, I feel a little more capable. Germs are also an anxiety for me so a lot of these help with that.
- Disposable toilet seat covers – I use these all the time. I cannot stand placing my bum on a public toilet seat.
- Chapstick – Chapped lips make everything bad.
- Protein bars – Good to have one in a bag in case those hunger pangs come on. When you’re not starving, you’re able to think more clearly.
